Friday, March 12, 2010

Thank you for all the birthday greetings!

Let's just say right off the bat that it was an....uhhm....interesting day.  It wasn't what I would characterize as a fun birthday, nor would I care to ever repeat today's experiences on a subsequent birthday, but it was...well....interesting. :)

First thing this morning I had to get ready to go to the city for 2 appointments to fix different aspects of the van, because a family in our church is renting it next week to take their daughters and their friends on a ski trip to Colorado for Spring break.  After we had our windshield replaced in January (due to Paul hitting a deer), the windshield quickly developed an air leak.  The day it was installed it was cold and snowy, so the adhesive didn't set up correctly.  Yeah, we should have known better than to schedule the replacement that day, but oh well....it has a lifetime warranty, so the repair today didn't cost anything.

The second scheduled repair wasn't totally necessary, but we thought it might be nice for the DVD player in the van to work for our renter's entertainment on the long trip to Colorado.  Today was the only day this week that both auto shops could schedule the appointments, so I left all the little ones home with our more-than-capable teenage daughters in charge.

I had to leave home by 8:30 to make the first appointment, and even after taking an unexpected detour to clean up a mess on the little boys' carpet (don't ask), I was still on schedule.  But then just as I was walking out the door, I saw that Jaden was sitting in a puddle of....well, for your sakes, I won't mention exactly *what* he was sitting in, but trust me, it wasn't a pretty sight.  I quickly yelled for HELLLLLPPPPP!!!!, and then Jamye and I tag-teamed the clean-up....poor Jamye got the worst end of the deal (if that gives you any indication what sort of puddle I am referring to).

This setback put me a few minutes behind schedule, but I was able to make up the time by driving just a tad over the speed limit...yeah, I know, it's the little foxes that spoil the vine.  I justified my rebellious behavior by thinking if I got pulled over and the officer saw on my driver's license that it was my birthday, he surely wouldn't be heartless enough to actually give me a ticket.  ;)  Thankfully, I didn't encounter a single cop on the way up or back.

The first appointment went fine, it was very quiet in the shop's waiting room, and the theater-style seating was comfortable and perfect for curling up with the historical fiction novel I had brought with me to read while I waited.  The repair bill was a little more than we expected, but having a working DVD player in the van to keep the little ones entertained during long road trips is worth every penny.

I had just enough time between appointments to eat lunch, and I decided on a Chinese buffet on the other side of town.  As I was filling my plate, I came across a dish I'd never seen or eaten before....spicy octopus.  Feeling just a bit adventurous (since it was my birthday), I decided to go for it and try one.

Ok, so I'll admit, I'm pretty much a chicken when it comes to trying new foods...I'd never eaten lobster until my first official date with Paul on my birthday 23 years ago, when he took me to a upscale seafood restaurant in Colorado Springs.   But back then I was young and "in love", so trying a new dish was exciting and romantic, whereas today, on my own and without a dining companion to impress, I was having a difficult time working up the courage to take a bite of the pathetic little creature looking up at me with such sad, soulful eyes. When I had finished off the entire plate except for the octopus, with its eight tiny little tentacles all curled in toward its body in self-protective gestures, I just didn't have the heart to consume it.  I finally just pushed my plate away and said, "Rest in peace, little guy."


(Ok, so the picture is a little out of focus....use your imagination.)

After I paid the bill, I had just enough time to drive back to the downtown area for my second appointment.  When I walked into the auto glass office, it was totally empty.  I looked at the clock on the wall and was surprised to see I was 30 minutes early, because according to the clock in the van, I was right on time.  A quick check of my cell phone verified that the office clock was correct, and the van time was wrong.  Then I remembered that the radio shop had probably needed to unhook the battery to work on the DVD player, and they hadn't bothered to reset the clock, so it was 12 hours and 30 minutes off.   No wonder I was early.

The person who set the windshield repair appointment said the shop techs took lunch until 2pm, so I had time to go pick up a bottle of water to drink while I waited for the repair to be finished.  When I got back to the office at 2pm, it was *still* empty.  Weird.  Then I noticed a sign on the desk... "For assistance, dial 4109."  Ah HAH....looks like the recession has hit the auto glass industry as well...the owners could save the cost of a receptionist by hooking up the office phone to the shop area, and then make the shop techs answer their own phones.  It's a little off-putting for customers to walk into an empty office, but whatever.

I was pleased that the estimated 1.5 - 2 hour repair was completed in 1 hour, so I had time to do a little shopping before heading for home.  I went to two different Target stores to exchange Jaxon's Easter shoes, which I had ordered online, but when they arrived it was immediately apparent they were one size too large. After checking the in-store stock, Jaxon will have to settle for a different shoe in the smaller size, because the original shoe doesn't come in a smaller size.  Oh well, Jaxon will still be the cutest little 2 yr old in the nursery on Easter morn, even if his shoes don't exactly match big brother Jaden's. ;)

In our family we always let the birthday boy or girl choose where they'd like to eat out for lunch or supper, so my plan was to go to my favorite local Mexican restaurant, Playa Azul, for supper tonight.  But when I arrived home I quickly realized that we wouldn't be eating out tonight, because little Jaxon was feeling "out of sorts", so I settled for take out from Long John Silver's.  Not exactly "haute cuisine", but still enjoyable, since I didn't have to cook. ;)

All things considered, this wasn't up there in the top 10 best birthdays ever, but on the other hand, it wasn't the worst birthday I've ever experienced either. It was just another typical day in the life of a mom of nine kids.  Even so, I wouldn't trade the unpleasant clean-ups and hectic schedule irritations that made up this "ordinary" birthday as the mother of nine for a lifetime of spectacular birthdays if it meant being without the love of my beautiful family.  I have ....*truly*.... been blessed beyond measure.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

an open letter to my brothers and sisters in Christ who serve in leadership to homeschooling families:

March 1st, 2010

On February 6, 2010, Lydia Schatz, the seven year old homeschooled daughter of Kevin and Elizabeth Schatz, died after having been brutally beaten for mispronouncing a word while reading out loud to her mother. Butte County, California District Attorney, Mike Ramsey, reported that evidence shows the child was severely and repeatedly whipped, most likely for several hours, with a 15” piece of ¼” plumbing supply line, the same instrument that also left her older sister with severe kidney damage and in critical condition. The other seven Schatz children are now in foster homes, their parents having been charged with torture and murder.

While it might be comforting to believe that this is one horrific, isolated case of abusive behavior, the fact is that Kevin and Elizabeth Schatz were Bible-believing Christians who welcomed not only their own children into their home but three adopted ones as well. Their friends reported how shocked they were to hear this story about parents whom they called “loving” and “warm” and children who were “polite and well-behaved,” words that could describe most homeschooling families.

But Kevin and Elizabeth Schatz were also devotees of the book To Train Up A Child and its authors, Michael and Debi Pearl, and they patterned their “discipline” methods after the Pearls’ instructions, down to the very instrument they used to beat their children.

This is not the first time a child has died at the hands of parents who embraced the teachings from TTUAC. In 2004, four year old Sean Paddock suffocated after his mother also beat him with ¼” plumbing supply line and then wrapped him tightly in a blanket to keep him from getting out of bed. She is now serving time in jail for first degree murder.

The killing of precious children in the name of “discipline” must stop and those of us who desire to come alongside and encourage homeschooling families must do all that we can to see that this sort of tragedy never happens again. I believe that the Pearls’ teachings on chastisement unto repentance, found in their books and magazines and on their website, is not just one among many approaches to disciplining children, but rather, is a form of child abuse and even one that is considered to be assault and battery of a child and punishable by law in many states.

As Christians, it is even more important to understand that the Pearls’ philosophy is based on the aberrant theology of “sinless perfection,” a perspective that leads to the notion that parents are able to change a child’s sinful heart and save a child’s soul. Here are some excerpts from TTUAC:

“The parent holds in his hand (in the form of a little switch) the power to absolve the child of guilt, cleanse his soul, instruct his spirit, strengthen his resolve, and give him a fresh start through a confidence that all indebtedness is paid.”

“The guilt burdened soul cries out for the lashes and nails of justice. Your child cannot yet understand that the Creator has been lashed and nailed in his place. Only the rod of correction can preserve his soul until the day of moral dawning.”

“Let the guilt come, and then, while they are yet too young to understand, absolve it by means of the rod. When their time comes, the principles of the cross will be easy to grasp.”

The Holy Word of God tells us that only by faith in the finished, atoning work of Jesus Christ on the cross, an act of His mercy and grace, is a person saved. (“Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of the Holy Ghost.”~Titus 3:5) Physical chastisement by a parent cannot truly absolve a child of guilt nor can it cleanse his soul. To teach this and to lead any parent to think otherwise is promoting false doctrine and false hope in the works of man.

To that end, I would like to ask those who serve as homeschooling support group leaders and others who seek to serve within the homeschooling community to join the growing number of voices who are expressing their outrage and horror at the death of little Lydia Schatz and I would ask you to remove any recommendation of Michael and Debi Pearl’s teachings you have on your blogs or websites. Please stand with me and publicly say “This is wrong and it must stop.”

“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute. Speak up and judge fairly; defend the rights of the poor and needy.” ~ Proverbs 31:8-9

By His grace,
Karen Campbell,
homeschooling mother and grandmother

www.thatmom.com

P.S. I would like to ask any readers of this blog to copy this letter, add your name, and send this letter along to your homeschooling support group leaders and to any homeschooling family you know and ask them to do the same.